Change of plans. Kelly Clarkson saw herself “growing old” with Brandon Blackstock before her divorce. In an interview with Hoda Kotb on the Today show on Monday, September 14, the American Idol alum opened up about why she’s been so candid about her separation since she filed for divorce from Blackstock in June after almost seven years of marriage.

“You can ask anyone that’s gone through divorce—I don’t think anyone expects it,” Clarkson said. “You see yourself growing old with someone and then life has a different path. And it’s so hard on everyone.”

The “Since U Been Gone” singer also told Kotb why she’s been so open about her divorce.  “Because I think we all go through things so we can help each other not feel alone,” she said.

Clarkson’s comments come after she revealed that her next album will be inspired by her split from Blackstock, whom she shares two children with: daughter River, 6, and son Remington, 4. “This next record, this will probably be the most personal one I’ve ever released,” the Voice coach said in an interview on Sunday Today With Willie Geist on Sunday, September 13. “The whole record is basically every emotion you experience from the beginning of a relationship to the end of what it is now or where it is now. It’s been very therapeutic for me. It’s very honest.”

Source: Instagram

The “Behind These Hazel Eyes” singer also revealed how she’s been coping her split, which is by talking with other friends who have also experienced a divorce. “I mean, it’s no secret. My life has been a little bit of a dumpster,” Clarkson said “Personally, it’s been a little hard the last couple months.”

She continued, “I’ve been talking to friends that have been through divorce. I don’t know how people go through that without having some kind of outlet because it is the worst thing ever for everyone involved.”

Though it’s unclear why Clarkson and Blackstock divorced (she cited “irreconcilable differences” when she filed her divorce docs), a source told Entertainment Tonight in June that the couple’s relationship struggled while in quarantine. “Kelly and Brandon had been having problems for several months and were making a conscious effort to work things out,” the source said. “They both hoped quarantining away from L.A. in Montana would help them work things out in their marriage, but instead the change in environment was actually detrimental.”